Tips On Planning Your Dream Wedding
We all dream of a wedding full of happy tears, magically romantic moments, delighted guests, and no shortage of Pinterest-worthy details.
But, we’re going to level with you. Wedding planning comes with its challenges, learning experiences and “what the heck do I do now” instances.
Getting engaged is one of the most exciting times of your life, but when the dust settles, it starts to sink in how stressful planning a wedding can be and how much work it really is.
The amount of resources and to-do's are nerve-wracking to say the least. You start thinking, and overthinking. Should I hire a planner? Can I afford one? How am I going to plan my own wedding? This is one of the most important days of my life. How do I make it perfect-for-us?
5 Easy Steps To Plan Your Dream Wedding
It’s easy to start spinning around in circles and to question your capabilities. Add the financial restraint along with the emotions and you’ll be in the same place as Michelle, co-founder of The White Box (a former wedding e-design and planning service company) — so you're not alone!
Michelle has been in the wedding industry for years, but once she started planning her own wedding she felt more relatable to brides than ever before. That feeling of being overwhelmed with making the right decisions is enough to keep one up at night.
Carrie, also co-founder of The White Box, felt similarly noting, "My first wedding as a planner was my own. I was in your shoes and the pressure was on to succeed. But let us be the first to say, you can pull this off and we’re going to help you."
Between their years of experience and their successful respective weddings, they assure that these five tips come straight from the experiential heart — their best suggestions for when couples aren’t sure where to begin.
First thing’s first — PLAN A DATE NIGHT
At home on the sofa, or at a coffee shop. Talk about your favorite things to do as a couple. Maybe it's hiking or going to the beach. Maybe it's entertaining at your house with a large crowd — or just an intimate dinner gathering. Write down your top three, and let your wedding day reflect this (sobeit your theme). If you love to hike, find a relaxed outdoor location for a ceremony or reception. Inspired by the beach? Find a source of water whether that be a lake or the ocean. Love a large, loud party? Go for a space that can accommodate everyone and where the entertainment can be the main focus. Prefer a small gathering? A family-style dinner could be the perfect match! Then, discuss a guest count that would reflect this, and do your best to stay close to it.
TALK ABOUT THE B WORD
Oh, the dreaded budget chat. Definitely stick to your guns here. What are you comfortable spending, whether it be your money or family chipping in? Going outside of this range can put strain on all your relationships and your wellbeing. You can make any budget work as long as you choose your priorities right from the onset.
GET PINNING
You can start by pulling some images that ring true to your “theme." Pull 15 or so and then look for the common thread within. You may find you are drawn to natural, organic elements and color palettes. If you see a lot of blush in your intimate wedding inspiration, go with it and narrow your images down to 5, assuring they are cohesive and form a collection. Then, stop. No more pinning. Don’t second guess yourself. This is about your marriage, not over-analyzing sage versus eucalyptus green.
DO RESEARCH
Start to check out venues and photographers after you’ve proceeded through the above steps 1-3. Make sure they align with your relationship and goals as discussed on your date night. Pull together your look through event rentals (tables, chairs, and table linens). Then, move onto selecting flowers, invitations, bridesmaid dresses, décor, menu, and so on. Mimic your favorite restaurants that you love to frequent together or draw inspiration from your personal styles. Doing this will make certain this vendor process will reflect your joint identity as a couple.
FIND AN OUTLET
Throughout this planning journey, your body will fill itself with nervous energy — so, it’s productive to find an outlet through which to channel it. Make plans to enjoy your life, the engagement process, connecting in love and the planning experience itself. Consider this your brief reminder to go out with friends, exercise, visit family, date your fiancé(e), and do enough of what you enjoy most to counterbalance the stresses of planning.
Get More Dream Wedding Help
While you’re keeping Michelle and Carrie’s advice in mind, sometimes a little technology can go a long way and can be very cost effective. There are many apps and services available online but three wedding planning guides we like are Zola, The Knot, and WeddingWire. Even if you're working with a personal planner, they can be a big help. Here’s a bit more about these three tools:
ZOLA
Zola’s mission is to make wedding planning easy and aside from services, they offer expert advice. Need cake ideas or ways to cut costs? Check out their blog! No matter the size of your wedding, it can be helpful to have everything in one place. Here are a few ways Zola can help:
- Free registry: gifts, gift cards, and honeymoon funds in one place with free shipping, returns, and exchanges through the platform. Over 1,000 brands are carried in their store!
- Free wedding website: share your story, details on your event, where to stay, and more through an easily customizable template with hundreds of designs to choose from. With online RSVP it’s easier than ever to manage your guest list and you can even track meal choices and plus ones.
- Streamlined vendor search: explore pre-screened vendor listings with no ads and search by your style and budget.
- Invites and save the dates: coordinate your invites, save the dates, and other paper easily with a variety of designs. They’re relatively affordable, most from $1.99 each, and include free guest addressing and shipping.
- Wedding planning checklist: build a custom wedding checklist based on your activities, events, and tasks leading to the big day. Check off items along the way!
THE KNOT
The Knot is pretty similar to Zola and also free but it’s the veteran in the space. While some users have reported challenges with the RSVP management on consumer report websites, overall, it’s still one of the best resources out there. And again, their tips and tricks and all-in-one service are very helpful:
- Wedding vision: start with a wedding Style Quiz to discover your personal taste. Find inspiration, get organized, and show vendors what you’re thinking.
- Local vendors: once you take the quiz you’ll receive recommended vendors based on your preferences, location, and budget. You can look for vendors in all sorts of categories like venues, videographers, beauty, bands, and so much more.
- Another free site: build your custom site similarly to Zola with your story details, info for guests, RSVP log, registries, and more. You can even add a livestream of your ceremony on the big day. Change your template anytime and customize it to be just you. You’ll have it set up in minutes!
- The registry: use The Knot Registry Store to select your most-wanted gifts, link any other stores or registries on your site, set up a cash fund, and easily track your gifts as they’re purchased. Need some inspiration? Look at the must-haves for all other couples, too.
- A free wedding budgeter: use this tool to keep track of your spending and let the app do your math. The budgeter will break down your estimates and total spent, and even offers insider tips with the why, how, and when to spend more.
WEDDINGWIRE
Option three, yet another free wedding planning friend that’s easy to set up. Keep your checklist, budget, website, and vendors in one place. They’ve also got quite the store to shop! Consider this your wedding central space. Here are some highlights:
- Check off the list: make sure everything gets done with an easy checklist synched with your budget. Track progress along the way and delete anything that doesn’t apply to your plan. Add your notes and keep this list on hand.
- Manage your vendors: contact professions through your account and take details on each for reference. Save your top picks to compare pricing and reviews. Decision time has been simplified!
- Again, a free wedding site: you’ll have to make one! Just like Zola and The Knot, you can quickly create a custom site with your details, RSVPs and guest list linked, and add your WeddingWire registry. The Knot seems to have the most registry connections out there though…
- Seating chart: dread no more — easily drag and drop names from your guest list to assign everyone a seat. It might sound harsh, but be sure to invite people you think will mesh well. Hopefully all will be on their best behavior, but give it some thought nonetheless.
- Run the numbers: as you add to your list and add new services, the budgeter will keep track of your spending plans. Make it easy on yourself in the app.
We encourage you to visit some sample sites and to search around. You’re sure to find the best platform for you and your wedding-planning team!
Build Your Registry
While the timeline can vary based on who you are and the size of your wedding, one thing you’re going to need is a registry. This is your wishlist to share with everyone who wants to celebrate you. Planning your dream wedding should be a dream that’s detailed beyond the day itself — so find some gifts that keep on giving! You’ll enjoy curating it, and with a digital organizer, it’ll be easier than ever to distribute. Here’s where we suggest you begin:
- Think about the things that make you say, “We want this so much, but would never buy it for ourselves.” Fortunately, on your wedding day, someone in the crowd just might want to buy it for you! People want to get you something unique, usable, and wanted. Everyone hopes to know they made your day even more special, so put those items on the list! Add “most wanted” and similar labels if you have the option.
- Get back to basics. There are other things that you have and might want to replace or upgrade. For instance, the bath towels from your first place might be slightly sentimental, but when they’re threadbare the appeal is lost. Ask for high quality towel sets, shower curtains, pots and pans, and other “basics” that could level up. (Donate or reuse those originals!)
- Add a mix of the big and little things. Some of the items on your list could be camping equipment or appliances (espresso maker, air fryer… our favorites!) and some of the items might be holiday decorations, home details, or personal items. Make sure guests have your mailing address for those large items, especially when they’re visiting from out of town, but also know that some people will want to hand deliver you something regardless. Be ready for it all.
- Detail the plan for that cash. There’s no lying — cold hard cash and gift cards can be a big help, and sometimes, that’s what you really want the most. Tell your guests where that money is going to go. Whether to the honeymoon fund, for higher education, a future child, or whatever it may be, some people will have a heart for supporting your trip, goal, or mission.
- Try to avoid duplicates. With a range of registries out there, only pick each item on one registry unless they’re linked. You want guests to know what’s already been purchased and what’s still fair game. If someone has trouble marking a purchase complete, have them email you to remove it and to avoid a mix up.
A Nice Ring To It
La-ti-da! And you’re off to the races! We hope this post has helped you to plan the big day and we can’t wait to hear about it. Tag us with #mollymymag to share about your wedding and remember to enjoy your engagement!
This article was originally published in the summer 2018 issue of Molly My Mag under the title “You’re Engaged! Now What?” and has been expanded by our team here.
