Embrace Change, Let Go Of Fear

I found myself sobbing on my friend's porch for five hours straight. Why was I crying? My whole life finally made sense, so why was I upset? Change. I knew my life was about to change. Everything I knew before was about to shift into what I thought was a very new direction. Every doubt, every fear that I tucked away, came pouring out. I could no longer hide. It was time, but I was terrified. 

It's funny, we as humans are meant to shift, evolve, change all the time, and yet we fear it so much. We question it every step of the way. Even if deep down inside, we know it's probably the best move. Change is often the perfect thing for us. It means we have leveled up, we’re moving forward, getting us closer to what we always wanted and asked for. So why was I fighting it? 

The best place I could start to grasp this idea was with understanding my mind. What I had to realize was my logical brain was never meant to guide me. It's intended to protect me, but I had to understand what that truly meant so I could work with my mind, not against it. 

Every experience I’ve gone through meant that I registered a perception of that experience as good or bad. But that perception isn't accurate, it's just my emotional reaction to it. The thing is this world is in perfect balance. Everything is both good and bad. Albert Einstein, acknowledged to be one of the greatest physicists of all time, spent his life work proving this with science. Our planet would literally blow up if the balance was off. This means that in every situation you can find the good and the bad. So with this understanding, these memories stored in my mind are only half-truths. My brain protects me from limiting myself because that's the most dangerous thing I can do. When my brain kicks in to inform me of a fear, I can’t allow it to stop me from moving forward. I need to take it as a signal that I’m limiting myself; that it’s time to tackle the fears and move through them to feel more in control of my life.

It was empowering for me to realize that we’re powerful and limitless souls and it's our mission in this human experience to remember that we have no limits. I was finally able to let go of my fears and remember just how incredible being human really is.

So why was I crying on the porch? I had just had someone — someone I respect and admire — tell me that I was meant for a different career path, I had a higher purpose. And I was terrified because I knew she was right. I was crying because my life was about to change and I didn’t feel ready for that. There were too many unknowns and my brain told me to fear them. But I realized I could teach my brain to see that the unknowns meant I was about to wake up to some fantastic gifts, abilities, and new skills, getting me closer to who I am. Experiencing unknowns meant I mastered everything before, and it was time for new.

Another fear I had was believing I wasn’t good enough. I had to teach my mind that this perception of myself was false. I mean, hello brain, that’s definitely false. I was always good enough, and that doubt was harming my life in many ways. It was time to let go of it.  

How? I had to understand that when change happens, it's essential to isolate the fears. To acknowledge the fears as only half-truths from a past experience, not fact and definitely not something to dictate my life by. My mind's job was never to give me direction; that’s my intuition's  job, or in other words, my gut instinct. I then began to understand that my intuition doesn’t stem from my past experiences. It’s guided by a higher power, a place of truth. 

Once I understood how fears played a part in my decision making it was important to know that change doesn't cause pain; it's my resistance to it that does. Sitting in my fears or doubts long enough causes the pain I’m feeling. By walking through those fears and doubts in order to understand and shift them, I found that the pain disappears. Change is no longer painful but a tool to help me let go of all doubts so that those fears don't cause more pain and blocks in my life. This shift created an opportunity for me to become limitless. 

The thing is, it doesn't matter what I have or haven't done because there’s a bigger picture. But humans tend to stay fixated on the small details most of the time because we want instant gratification. Who doesn't? So as I made choices about my life, I couldn’t quite see how it was all tied together. But when I pulled back to look at the bigger picture, it started making a lot more sense. This is not to say that everything I’ve done up until this point is for nothing. In fact, everything I do plays a part in leading me ultimately to who I’m meant to be.

At the point in my life when change was around the corner, I was running another business of mine and it was doing well, but I knew that it wasn't my soul's purpose. So once I realized I was meant to do healing work, it felt like a big jump. I felt like I had such a long way to go to get to the end goal. That feeling almost stopped me from making the jump. And I see the bigger picture now. 

I couldn’t let logical thinking of how things should go or don't go together stop me. I knew my mind was really good at pointing out how things don't go together but not good at seeing the connections just yet. On a soul level, everything I do, from the very first job I had and the relationships I have been in, tied me to who I am and who I’m meant to be. So I made the decision to always listen to my gut no matter what that looks like. I look back on that jump now and see that it wasn't as big as I thought, but just maybe a moment that changed my life for the better; a moment I’ll never forget. There’s always a greater plan and that plan definitely looks very different compared to the one I had in my mind. Ultimately I decided to listen to my intuition and take the jump! I embraced the change and let go of the fears, and I’ve never regretted that.

Change is a graduation from your past into your future. It's the moment where you become closer to who you are and farther away from the limits that weigh your life down. My life changed when I realized that change doesn't need to be scary, but a moment for my mind to say, “Wooo-hooo! Gifts are about to enter my life. Let's do this thing!”